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لَا يَتْكُوْتَهُنَّ الْفَخْرُ فِي الْأَحْسَابٍ وَالتَّعُنُ فِى الْأَنْسَابِ وَالْإِسْتِدْقَاءُ بِالنُّجُوْمِ وَالنِّيَاحَةُ وَقَالَ النَّائِحَةُ إِذَا
لَمْ تَتُبُ قَبْلَ مَوْنِهَا تُقَامُ يَوْمِّ الْقِيَامَةِ وَعَلَيْهَا سِرُبَالٌ مِنْ قَطِرَانٍ قَدِرُءُ مِنْ جَرَبٍ(رواه مسلم)
صلى narrated that Allah's Messenger رضى الله عنه Sayyiduna Abu Maalik al-Ash'ary .1727
, Ale à said, "Four things in my ummah are from the traits of the Jahiliyah
(ignorance period) and they will not give them up. They are: boasting on singular
trait, insulting others on their genealogy, seeking rain with the stars (astrology) and
wailing." He added. "If a wailing woman does not repent before her death, then she
will be made to stand on the day of resurrection having on herself clothing of pitch
and a chemise of (itching) ménage."1
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1
COMMENTARY: The first is such a characteristic in a person as makes him regard himself
to be superior, like bravery or courage or eloquence. The second is to find defects in
another person's ancestors. There is no harm in bath of them if Islam is at the base of them.
A Muslim may boast because of his Islam and another's disbelief.
To seek rain with the stars is to subscribe to the belief that stars have an influence on
weather and rain. It is forbidden to believe that stars in different houses in a horoscope
spell rain and showers. Rather, when it rains, we must say that Allah has sent down rain
as His favour.
Wailing is to cry loudly and describe the dead with superb and imagined good qualities.
This clothing of pitch will be like coulter and will emit a bad odour. A woman who wails
and does not repent before death will have itching on the day of resurrection and that will
be augmented with the chemise of mange.
(١٧٢٨) وَعَنْ أَنٍّ قَالَ مَرَّ النَّبِىُّ صَلَّى اللّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ بِامْرَأَةٍ تَبْكِئْ عِنْدَ قَبْرٍ فَقَالَ اتَّقِى اللَّهُ وَاصْبِرِئُ قَالَّتُ
إِلَيْكَ عَتِى فَإِنَّكَ لَمْ تُصَبُ بِعُصِيْيَتِ وَلَمْ تَعْرِفْهُ فَقِيلَ لَهَا إِنَّهُ النَّبِىُّ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ فَأَتَتْ بَابَ النَِّيِّ صَلَّى
اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ فَلَمُ تَجِدُ عِنْدَهُ بَوَّابِيْنَّ فَقَالَتْ لَمُ أَعْرِفُتَ فَقَالَ إِنَّمَا الشَّبْرُ عِنْدَ الشَّدَمَةِ الْأُولِى (متفق عليه)
1728. Sayyiduna Anas رضى الله عنه narrated that the Prophet صلى اللهعليه وسلم came by a woman
weeping at a grave. He said. "Fear Allah (and do not wail). Show patience." She
retorted, "Go away from me! You are not beset with my affliction," for, she did not
know him. Then she was told. "He is the prophet (> Jule!" (That was enough for
her!) she went to his door but there was no doorkeeper. She said, 'I had not
recognized you." He said, "Patience is (correct) only at the first strike."2
COMMENTARY: How true it is that one must heed what is spoken! It is not necessary to
see who is speaking. The woman should have weighed in the words without considering
who is speaker was. She would not have had to repent.
The preferred patience which earns reward is one that is shown at the time of affliction.
Later, a person learns to endure, after all and it makes no difference then.
FORBIDDEN TO WAIL
The forgoing ahadith make it amply clear that it is forbidden to wail, describe lofty
1
1 Muslim # 29, 434, Musnad Ahmad 5-342.
2 Bukhari # 1283, Muslim # 15.926, Abu Dawud # 3124, Nasa'i # 1869, Tirmidhi # 987, Ibn Majah #
1596, Musnad Ahmad 3-140.
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attributes of the dead while wailing shrieking the while, beating the cheeks, ripping the
clothing from the front, pulling the hair, shaving them, blackening the face, pouring dust
over the head and doing all such things as are signs of lack of endurance.
DEATH OF THREE CHILDREN OF MUSLIM
(١٧٢٩) وَعَنْ أَبِيْ هُرَيْرَةَ قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ لَا يَمُوْتُ لِمُسْلِمٍ ثَلَاثَةٌ مِنَ الْوَلَدِ فَيَلِجُ
النَّارَ إِلَّ تَحِلَّةَ الْقَسَمِ (متفق عليه)
1729. Sayyiduna Abu Hurayrah رضى الله عنه narrated that Allah's Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم said,
"A Muslim whose three children die will not go to hell except to expiate the oath."1
COMMENTARY: The expiation of the oath refers to the Quran:
وَإِنْ قِنْكُمْ وَاللّهِ إِلَّ وَارِدُهَا الآية
{And there is not one of you, but shall come to it .... } (19:71)
It is as though the words 'By Allah' are understood in the verse: 'there is no one who shall
not enter hell,' though he may go in for a moment like lightening or breeze. The fact is that
a bridge, called sirat, will be raised over hell. Everyone - Muslim or otherwise - will go
over it. He may be pious or evil. The only difference is that the pious will pass over it
smoothly into paradise but the evil will suffer harm and fall down into hell.
The Muslim who loses three children will enter hell for only this moment to expiate the
oath. Actually, he will not go into hell but go over the sirat which is the bridge over hell.
He will not suffer any kind of punishment.
This kind of expiation of oath is often heard in the conversation of the linguists.
(١٧٣٠) وَعَنْهُ قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللهِ صَلَى اللّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ لِنِسْوَةٍ مِنَ الْأَنْصَارِ لَا يَمُوْتُ لِإِحْدَا كُنَّ ثَلَاثَةٌ مِنَّ
الْوَلَدِ فَتَحْتَسِبُهُ إِلَّ دَخَلَتِ الْجِنَّةَ فَقَالَتِ امْرَأَةٌ قِنْهُنَّ أَوِ اثْنَانٍ يَا رَسُولَ اللّهِ قَالَ آوِاثْنَانٍ - رَوَاءُ
مُسْلِمْ وَفِيْ رِوَايَةٍ أَّهُمَا ثَلَاثَةُ لَّمْ يَبْلُوا الْجِنْثَـ
صلى الله عليه وسلم narrated that Allah's Messenger رضى الله عنه Sayyiduna Abu Hurayrah .1730
said to some women of the Ansars, "If three children of anyone of you die and she
hopes for reward from Allah then she will enter paradise." So, one of them
submitted, "Or two, O Messenger of Allah?" He agreed, "Or two."
According to another version: "There who had not attained puberty."2
COMMENTARY: The woman who loses three children does not wail but endures her loss,
saying:
إِنَّا لِلَّهِ وَإِنَّ إِلَيْهِرَاجِكُوْنَ
(To Allah we belong and to Him is our return). She will enter paradise.
She may go to paradise directly, or, after the intercession of her children.
When a woman enquired about death of two children, The prophet ,le & received a
1 Bukhari #: 6656, Muslim # 150-2632, Tirmidhi # 1060, Nasa'i # 1856, Ibn Majah # 1603, Muwatta
Maalik # 38 (Jana'iz) Musnad Ahmad 2-239.
2 Bukhari # 1381, Muslim # 151-2632, Tirmidhi # 1059, Nasa'i # 1873, Ibn Majah # 1604, Muwatta :
Maalik # 39, (Janai'z), Musnad Ahmad 2-510.

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Diving revelation that accepted the woman's plea. Or, he prayed to Allah for that and his
prayer was granted.
The stipulation that the children should be minor respects a woman's love for her young
children more than for the grown ups.
REWARD FOR PATIENCE
(١٧٣١) وَعَنْهُ قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ يَقُولُ اللهُ مَا لِعَبْدِىُ الْمُؤْمِنِ عِنْدِىٌ جَزَّاٌ إِذَا قَبَضْتُ
صَفِيَّةٍ مِنْ أَهْلِ الدُّنْيَا تُؤَّ أَخْتَسَبَةُ إِلَّ الْجِنَّةَّ(رواه البخارى)
صلى الله عليه وسلم narrated that Allah's Messenger رضى الله عنه Sayyiduna Abu Hurayrah .1731
said that Allah says, "when I take away from My believing slave his dear friend
from among the worldly people and he hopes for reward from me, then I have for
him nothing better than paradise as a reward."1
COMMENTARY: The dear friend could be children, parents, or such others.
The hadith is about worldly people. If anyone devoted to the hereafter dies and this person
shows patience then he earns much good fortune and honour. Allah will be please with
him and Allah's pleasure is a great blessing.
SECTION II
الفَضلُ الثَّانِى
CURSE ON ONE WHO WAILS & WHO LISTEN TO IT
(١٧٣٢) وَعَنْ أَبِئْ سَعِيْدِ الْخُدْرِيّ قَالَ لَعَنَ رَسُولُ اللهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ النَّائِحَةَ وَالْمُسْتَمِعَةَ(رواه ابوداؤد)
صلى الله narrated that Allah's Messenger رضي الله عنه Sayyiduna Abu Sa'eed al Khudri .1732
jule cursed the woman who wai'ls and who listen to her.2
COMMENTARY: The wailing woman is one who describes the good qualities of the dead
while crying aloud. Or, she is one who cries over the dead shrieking.
The woman who listens to her is one who lends on ear to the wailing woman and likes her act.
BELIEVER IS PATIENT AND GRATEFUL AT ALL TIMES
(١٧٣٣) وَعَنْ سَعِيدٍ بُنِ أَبِيْ وَقَّاصٍ قَالَ قَالَ تَسْوُلُ اللّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ عَجَبْ لِّلْمُؤْمِنِ إِنْ آَصَابَهُ
خَيْرٌ فَحَمِدَ اللّهَ وَشَكَّرَ وَإِنْ أَصَابَتُهُ مُصِيْبَةٌ حَمِدَ اللهُ وَصَبَرَ فَالْمُؤْمِنُ يُؤْجَّرُ فِي كُلِّ أَهْرِهٍ حَتَّى فِيِ اللَّقُمَةِ
يَرْ فَعُهَا إِلى فِي امْرَأَتِه- (رواه البيهقى فى شعب الإيمان)
صلى الله narrated that Allah's Messenger رضى الله عنه Sayyiduna Sa'd ibn Abu waqqas .1733
dujųle said, "It is amazing with the believer. When good comes his way, he praises
Allah and thanks Him. When distress afflicts him, he praises Allah and bears it
patiently. So, the believer is rewarded in each of his affairs, even for the morsel that
he raises to his wife's mouth."3
COMMENTARY: This hadith brings out the merit of the believer and his distinction which
is a pride.
He is ever grateful to Allah whatever overtakes him. And, he always praises Allah. Hence,
.
1 Bukhari # 6422, Nasa'i # 1871, Musnad Ahmad 2-417.
2 Abu Dawud # 3128, Musnad Ahmad 3-165.
3 Musnad Ahmad 10182, Bayahqi Shab ul-Eeeman # 9951.
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Allah rewards him for all his acts that are permissible. Of course, the things that he does
must be dictated with honest and good intentions and hope to earn reward. For instance,
the morsel he feeds his wife must be prompted with an intention to give her the right for
which Allah has made him responsible and he desires to please Allah is this way. This
seemingly simple permissible act will fetch him a mighty reward and blessing.
EARTH & HEAVEN WEEP WHEN A BELIEVER DIES
(١٧٣٤) وَعَنُ أَنّسٍ قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ مَا مِنْ مُؤْمِنٍ إِلَّ وَلَهُ بَابَانٍ بَابٌ يَصْعَدُ مِنْهُ
عَمَلُهُ وَبَابْ يَّنْزِلُ مِنْهُ رِزْقُهُ فَإِذَا مَاتَ بَكَّيَا عَلَيْهِ فَذَلِكَ قَوْلُهُ تَعَالِى فَمَا بَكِّثُ عَلَيْهِمُ السَّمَآءُ
وَالْأَرْضُ(رواه الترمذى)
1734. Sayyiduna Anas رضى الله عنه narrated that Allah's Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم said,
"There is not a believer but there are two gates for him. By one his deeds ascend
and by the other his provision descends. When he dies, both (the gates) weep for
him. That is according to the words of Allah, the Exalted;
فَمَا بَكَّتُ عَلَيْهِمُ السَّمَاءُ وَالْأَرْضُ
{So the heaven and the earth wept not for them, nor were they respited) (44:29)
COMMENTARY: None of the two weeps for the disbeliever. But, heaven and earth, both,
weep for the believer.
TREASURE OF THE HEREAFTER
(١٧٣٥) وَعْنِ ابْنِ عَبَّاسٍ قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ مَنْ كَانَ لَهُ فَرَطَانٍ مِنْ أُمَّتِىْ
آدُخَلَهُ اللهُ بِهِمَا الْجَنَّةَ فَقَالَتْ عَائِشَةُ فَمَنْ كَاَ لَ فَرَْ مِنْ أُمَّتِّثَ قَالَ وَمَنُّ كَاتَ لَهُ فَرَْظُ يَّا مُوَفَّقَةُ
فَقَالَتْ فَمَنْ لَّمْ يَكُنُ لَّهِ فَرَْطٌ مِنْ أُمَّتِكَ قَالَ فَأَنَا فَرَطُ أُقَتِىِّ لَنْ يُصَابُوا بِمِثْلِيٍ - رَوَاهُ التِّرْمِذِىُّ وَقَّالَ
هذَا حَدِيْثُ غَرِيُبْ۔
1735. Sayyiduna Ibn Abbas رضى الله عنه narrated that Allah's Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم said,
"If anyone of my ummah has two children who precede him (in death) then Allah
will admit him to paradise because of them." Sayyidah Ayshah us àl +, asked,
"What, if one of your ummah have one child who precedes him?' He said, "And, he
whose one child precedes him, O Muwaffaqah (fortunate one)!" She asked. "What
of one who has no child precedes him?" He said, "I am the farat of my ummah who
have never been afflicted by a loss to compare with (suffering) less of me."1
COMMENTARY: Farat is the man who precedes the caravan to their destination and makes
arrangement for the members of the caravan for their provision, etc. In this hadith farat is
the child who dies before attaining puberty. This child is called farat because he (or she)
precedes its parents to paradise and arranges for them the bounties of paradise. It will
intercede with Allah for its parents and take them to paradise. However. The farat in t he
concluding sentence of the hadith 'I am farat.' Does not refer to their minor child.
1 Tirmidhi # 1064, Musnad Ahmad # 3098.

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The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم described Sayyidah Ayshah (r0 as 'muwaffaqah' for her
exceptional relationship, qualities and merits. It embraces all excellences for Allah caused
her to ask about the good things.
He said of himself that he was the intercessor for his ummah whom he would take to
صلى الله عليه وسلم paradise. Reward is in proportion to affliction and hardship. The Prophet's
departure from this world is an incomparable hardship and affliction. Every member of his
ummah is hurt by his departure and this loss is enough treasure for them in the hereafter.
REWARD FOR PATIENCE ON LOSS OF CHILDREN
(١٧٣٦) وَعَنْ آَبِيْ مُؤْسَى الْأَشْعَرِيِّ قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ إِذَا مَاتَ وَلَدُ الْعَبْدِقَالَ اللّهُ
تَعَالِى لِمَلَآئِكَتِه قَتَضْتُهُ وَلَدَ عَبْدِىٌ فَيَقُوْلُوْنَ نَعَمْ فَيَقُوْلُ قَبُضْتُمُ ثَّمَرَةَ فُؤَادِهِ فَيَقُوْلُوْنَ نَعَمْ فَيَقُوْلُ
مَاذَا قَالَ عَبْدِىٌ فَيَقُوْلُوْنَ حَمِدَكَ وَاسْتَرْجَةَ فَيَقُولُ اللَّهُ ابْنُوْا لِعَبْدِىُ بَيْتًا فِي الْجُنَّةِ وَ سَهُّوُهُ بَيْتَ
الُحُهْدِ (رواه أحمد والترمذى)
صلى الله narrated that Allah's Messenger رضى اللهعنه Sayyiduna Abu Musa Al-Ash'ary .1736
dujųle said, "When someone's child dies, Allah asks the angels, 'Did you take away
the child of My slave?' They answer. 'Yes.' He asks, 'Did you taka away the fruit of
his heart?' T hey say, 'Yes' He ask 'what did My slave say? 'They say, 'He praised
you and said (انا لله وانا اليه راجعون) (we belong to Allah and to Him is our return). Then
Allah say, 'Build for My slave a house in paradise and name it Bayt ul Hamd.'1
COMMENTARY: Bayt ul Hamd (House of Praise) is the name given because the man
displayed exemplary servitude and even in times of tragedy, he showed patience and
expressed gratitude.
COMFORTING THE DISTRESSED
(١٧٣٧) وَعَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ مَسْعُوْدٍ قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ مَنْ عَزَّى مُصَابًا فَلَّهُ مِثْلُ آجُرِه۔
رَوَاهُ التِّرْمِذُِّ وَابْنُ مَاجَةً وَقَالَ التِّزْمِذِيُّ هَذَا حَدِيْتٌ غَرِيْبُ لَا تَعْرِفُهُ مَرْ فُوْقًا إِلَّا مِنْ حَدِيْثٍ عَلِّ ابْنِ
عَاصٍِ الرَّاوِيُ وَقَالَ وَرَوَاءُ بَعْضُهُمُ عَنْ مُحَتَّدِ بْنِ سُوْقَّةَ بِهِذَا الْإِسْنَادِ مَوْقُوْقًا.
صلى الله narrated that Allah's Messenger رضى الله عنه Sayyiduna Abdullah ibn Mas'ud .1737
, Als said, "He who comforts one who is distressed will get a reward like the
reward of the distressed."2
COMMENTARY: Here, the word 'distressed' covers affliction of different kinds through
death, etc. Anyone who comforts such a distressed person is a means to get sting him to be
patient and earning reward. So, he too gets that reward. For (Arabic) (one who guides to
what is good is as the doer). This hadith is backed by:
مَا مِنْ مُسْلٍِ يُعَزِّئْ آَخَاهُ بِعُصِيبَةٍ إِلَّا كَسَاهُ اللهُ مِنْ حُلَلِ الْكَرَامَةِ يَوْمَ الْقِيَامَةِ
"If any believer exhorts his brother to be patient against, then Allah, the Glorious,
1 Tirmidhi # 1023, Musnad Ahmad 4-415.
2 Tirmidhi # 1078, Ibn Majah # 1602.
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will attire him with a garment of excellence." (Ibn Majah # 1601)
(١٧٣٨) وَعَنْ أَبِيِّ بَرْزَةً قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ مَنْ عَزَّى ثَكْلِى كُبِيَ بُرُدَّا فِي الْجَنَّةِ رَوَاهُ
التِّرْمِذِىُّ وَقَالَ هُذَا حَدِيثٌ غَرِيُبُ-
صلى الله عليه وسلم narrated that Allah's Messenger رضى الله عنه Sayyiduna Abu Barzah .1738
said, "One who comforts a woman who has lost a child will be given to wear a
striped cloak in paradise."1
ARRANGING MEAL FOR THE BEREAVED
(١٧٣٩) وَعَنُ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ جَمْفَرٍ قَالَ لَمَّا جَاءَ تَمْىُ جَعْفٍَ قَالَ النَِّيُّ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ إِصْنَعُوا لِأُلِ جَعُفَرٍ
طَعَامًا فَقَدْ آتَاهُمُ ما يُشْغِلُهُمُ (رواه الترمذى وابوداود وابن ماجة)
1739. Sayyiduna Abdullah ibn Ja'far as à , narrated that when news of death of
(Sayyiduna) Ja'far رضى الله عنه arrived, the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said, (to the people of the
house), "Prepare food for the family of Jafar, for, there has come to them what keeps
them occupied."2
COMMENTARY: It is mustahab (desirable) for the relatives and neighbours to send to the
bereaved family meal enough for all of them for one day and one night to satiating point.
Some authorities say that they must send the meal for three days.
MAY OTHER PEOPLE EAT
The ulama (Scholars) differ on this question. Some say that others at their home must not eat,
but some others say that there is no harm if any visitor shares the meal with the bereaved.
The ulama (Scholars) also say that those who send the meal must ensure that the family of the
dead have eaten the food. In their occupation, they might overlook the meal or not like to eat.
It is makruh (unbecoming) to prepare food for the wailing women, Sayyiduna Jabir As dn>,
said, "We regard this (serving food to wailing women) as a kind of wailing." Thus, it is
clearly forbidden to prepare food for the wailing woman.
Imam Ghazali als>, said that it is makruh (unbecoming) to join in preparing the meal for this
purpose for the bereaved.
Mulla Ali Qari ales, said that this thing is makruh (unbecoming) if the meal is not prepared
from the property of the orphans or of anyone who is away. But, if it is prepared from the
property of any one of them then it is forbidden.
SECTION III
الفَصلُ الثَّالِثُ
THE DEAD IS PUNISHED IF ANYONE WAILS OVER HIM
(١٧٤٠) عَنِ الْمُخِيُرَةِ بْنِ شُعْبَةً قَالَ سَمِعْتُ رَسُولَ اللهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ يَقُوْلُ مَنْ نِيْمَ عَلَيْهِ فَإِنَّه يُعَذَّبُ
بِمَا نِيْجَ عَلَيْهِ يَوْمَ الْقِيَامَةِ (متفق عليه)
1740. Sayyiduna Al-Mughirah ibn Shu'bah us at , narrated that he heard Allah's
Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم say. "He over whom any one wails will be punished on the
1 Tirmidhi # 1078.
2 Abu Dawud # 3132, Tirmidhi # 998, Ibn Majah # 1610, Musnad Ahmad # 1751.
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day of resurrection for the waling over him."1
(١٧٤١) وَعَنْ عَمْرَةً بِنْتِ عَبْدِ الرَّحْمُنِ أَنَّمَا قَالَتْ سَمِعْتُ عَائِشَةً وَذُكِرَ لَّهَا أَّ عَبْدَاللَّهِ بُنَ عُمَرَ يَقُوْلُ
إِثَّ الْمَنْتَ لَيُعَذَّبُ بِبْكَّاءِ الْخَيِّ عَلَيْهِ تَقُولُ يَغْفِرُ اللهُ لِأَنْ عَبْدِ الرَّحْمُنِ آَمَا أَنَّهُ لَمْ يَكْذِبُ وَلكِنَّهُ نَسِّ
أوْاَخُطَأَ إِنَّمَا مَرَّ رَسُولُ اللهِ صَلَّى اللّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ عَلَى يَهُوْدِيَّةٍ يُبْكُ عَلَيْهَا فَقَّالَ إِنَّهُمْ لَيَبْكُوْكَ عَلَيْهَا
وَإِنَّهَا لَتُعَذَّبُ فِيْ قَبْرِهَا (متفق عليه)
1741. Sayyidah Amrah bint Abdur Rahman narrated that she heard (Sayyidah)
Ayshah رضى الله عنها say when told that Abdullah ibn Umar رضى الله عنه said that the dead
is punished for the weeping of the living over them, "May Allah forgive Abu
Abdur Rahman. Indeed, he does not lie, but has forgotten, or is mistaken. Allah's
Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم had merely passed by (the grave of) a Jewess and saw
people weeping over her. So, he said, 'They weep over her while she is being
punished in her grave."2
COMMENTARY: The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said that those people were unaware that the
woman was being. Punished in the grave. They wept for her love. He did not say that she
was punished because of their weeping. Rather, she was being chastised as all infidels are.
The ulama (Scholars) say that Sayyidah Ayshah's us an , objection was based on her
deduction. She would have been correct if the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم saying was limited to
only this occasion, but, in fact, his saying of this nature is narrated by many sahabah attass.
This question will be discussed against the next hadith
1
(١٧٤٢) وَعَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ أَبٍ مُلَيْكَةً قَالَ تُوُفِّيَتُ بِنُتْ لِّعُثْمَاتَ بْنِ عَقَّانَ بِمَكَّةً فَجِئْنَا لِتَشْهَدَهَا
وَحَضَرَهَا ابْنُّ عُمَرَ وَ ابْنُ عَبَّاسِ فَإٍِّ تَجَالِسْ بَيْتَهُمَا فَقَّالَ عَبْدُ اللَّهِ بْنُّ عُمَرَ لِعَهْرٍ و بُنِ عُقْمَانَ وَ هُوَ
هُوَّاجِهُهُ أَلَا تَنْهَى عَنِ الْبُكَاءِ فَإِّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ قَالَ إِكَّ الْمَنْتَ لَيُعَذَّبُ بِبْكَاْءِ آَهْلِهٍ
عَلَيْهِ فَقَالَ ابْنُ عَبَّاسٍ قَدْ كَانَ عُمَرُ يَقُوْلُ بَعْضَ ذَلِكَ ثُؤَّ حَدَّثَ فَقَالَ صَدَّرْتُ مَعَ هُمَرَ مِنْ تَگَّةً حَتّىإِذَا
كُثَّا بِالْبَيْدَآءِ فَإِذَا هُوَ يَرُكّبُ تَحْتَ ظِلّ سَمُرَةٍ فَقَالَ اذْهَبُ فَانْظُرُ مَنْ هؤلاءِ الرَّكْبُ فَتَظَرْتُ فَإِذَ اهُوَ
صُهَيْبْ قَالَ فَأَخْبَرَّتُهُ فَقَالَ ادْعُدْ فَرَجَعْتُ إِلَى صُهَيْبٍ فَقُلْتُ ارْتَجِلُ فَالْتُقْ آَمِيُرَ الْمُؤْمِنِيْنَ عُمَرَ فَلَنَّا أَبُ
أُصِيْبَ عُمَرُ دَخَلَ صُهَيْبُ يَبْكِىْ يَقُولُ وَاآخَاهُ وَا صَاحِبَاهُ فَقَالَ عُمَرُ يَا صُهَيْبُ أَتَّبْكِيْ عَلَّ وَقَّدُ قَالَ رَسُولُ
اللّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ إِّ الْتَّيِّتَ لَيُعَذَّبُ بِبَعْضِ بُكَاءِ أَهْلِمٍ عَلَيْهِ فَقَالَ ابْنُ عَبَّاسٍ فَلَمَّا مَاتَ عُمَرُ
ذَكَّرُتُ ذُلِكَ لِعَائِشَةً فَقَالَتْ يَرْحَمُ اللَّهُ عُمَرَ لَّا وَاللَّهِ مَا حَدَّثَ رَسُوْلُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّوَ إِّ
1 Bukhari # 1291, Muslim # 28.933, Tirmidhi # 1000, Musnad Ahmad 2-61.
2 Bukhari # 1289, Muslim # 27.932, Abu Dawud # 3129, Tirmidhi # 1006, Nasa'i # 1056, Ibn Majah #
1595, Muwatta Maalik # 37, (Jana'iz), Musnad Ahmad 2-38.
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الْمَيِّتَ لَيُعَذَّبُ بِبْكَاءِ أَهْلِهِ عَلَيْهِ وَلكِنْ إِنَّ اللهَ يَزِيْدُ الْكَافِرَ عَذَابًا بِبُكَاءِ أَهْلِهِ عَلَيْهِ وَقَالَتْ عَائِشَةٌ حَسْبُكُمُ
الْقُرْاُ وَلَا تَزِرُ وَازِرَةٌ وِ زْرَ أُخْرِى قَالَ ابْنُ عَبَّاسٍ عِنْدَ ذُلِكَ وَاللّهِ أَصْحَكَ وَأَبْكُى قَالَ ابْنُ آبيٍ مُلَيْكَةً
فَمَا قَالَ ابْنُ عُمَرَ شَيْئًا(متفق عليه)
1742. Sayyiduna Abdullah ibn Abu Mulaykah As a+, narrated that a daughter of
(Sayyiduna) Uthman ibn Affan us ål», died in Makkah. They went to participate
in the funeral and Ibn Umar رضى الله عنه and Ibn Abbas رضى الله عنه were also there. He sat
: between them. Abdullah ibn Umar رضى الله عنه asked Amr ibn Uthman رضى الله عنه who
was facing him to prevent them (his folk) from weeping, because Allah's
Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم had disclosed that the dead is punished for the weeping of
people over him. Ibn Abbas رضى الله عنه said that Umar رحمه الله used to say something
like that and he related an experience during his journey from Makkah with
Umar us an », when they saw some riders standing in the shade of a gum-acacia
three at al-Bayda. Umar can +, asked him to go and find out who the riders were.
رضى اله عنه among them and reported his finding to Umar رضى الله عنه He found Suhayb
who instructed him to fetch him. He went back to Suhayb wal +, and asked him
to come and meet the amir ul mumineen.
1
1
Later, when Umar رضى الله عنه was wounded (in Madinah), Suayb رضى الله عنه came weeping
and lamented, "O brother, O chief! (what has happened!)" Umar usano, reproached
him (even in his wounded condition), "O Suhayb, do you weep over me while
Allah's Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم did say, indeed, that the dead will surely be punished
for some of weeping of his family over him."
(Sayyiduna) Ibn Abbas رضى الله عنه added that when Umar رضى الله عنه died, he mentioned
that to (Sayyidah) Ayshah a >>. She exclaimed, "May Allah have mercy on Umar!
No, by Allah, never did Allah's Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم say that the dead will surely
be chastised for the weeping of his family over him. But, (he did say) that Allah
does increase the chastisement to the disbeliever because of the weeping of his
family over him." Then (Sayyidah) Ayshah رضى الله عنها said, "The (verdict of the )
Quran should suffice you:
وَلَّا تَزِرُ وَازِرَأْ وِّزْرَأُخْزِى
(And no bearer of burden shall bear the burden of another) (6:164, 17:15, 35:18, 39:7)
(Sayyiduna) Ibn Abbas sàn+, said, after that, (Indeed) Allah is He who makes one
to laugh and to weep." (A reference to 53:43, He meant to say that the implication of
that verse was like what he said.)
Then, (Sayyiduna) Ibn Abu Mulaykah رضى الله عنه concluded his narration, "Ibn Umar
1".(said nothing (on hearing this رضى الله عنه
COMMENTARY: 2 At the time of the salah (prayer) of fajr on Wednesday 26th Dhul Hijjah 23
AH, as Sayyiduna Umar we at +, stood in the mihrab and commenced the salah (prayer).
1 Bukhari # 1286, Muslim # 23-927.
2 See also hadith # 1724, 1742.
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suddenly the slave of Sayyiduna Mughirah ibn Shu'bah us at +), Abu Luluah who was
lying in wait behind him pounced on him with a large dual edged knife. He struck on his
ribs and hit him six times in all. Sayyiduna Umar usd+, fell down and was carried home.
News of his killing spread all over Madinah like wild fire and people thronged at his
house. Sayyiduna Suhayb رضى الله عنه was one of them. He saw Sayyiduna Umar رضى الله عنه in a
pool of blood and was stunned and cried involuntarily, saying. "O brother, O chief!" But,
he did not wail He neither shrieked nor was his voice sing song. Sayyiduna Umar usan>,
nevertheless, asked him to desist lest he transgress and violate the Shari'ah (divine law).
Sayyidah Ayshah Que al +, did not deny the hadith but rejected the deduction of Sayyiduna
Umar we àn +, from the hadith. The hadith itself is sahih and there is no doubt about it.
Sayyiduna Umar we àn+) and Abdullah deduced that the dead person is punished for the
weeping of his people over him whether he is a believer or an un believer.
Sayyidah Ayshah رضى الله عنها said that these words of the Prophet Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم are
about disbelievers. A disbeliever is punished anyway whether his folk weep over him or
not. Of course, if they weep then his punishment is augmented because he feels pleased
when they weep. So much so that some of the disbelievers left dying instruction that
mourning should be observed on their death.
Sayyidah Ayshah &+, relied for her opinion on the verse (6:164)
وَلَا تَزِرُ وَازِرَةْقِزْرَ أُخرى
{No bearer of burdens can bear the burden of another}
The sin of anyone cannot be recorded against another person and, hence, no one else can be
punished for the sin of a sinner himself. If the folk of the dead weep or wail, it is their deed,
why should their doing be recorded against the dead person?" why should he be punished
for their sins.
,رضى الله عنه too upheld the verdict of Sayyidah Ayshah رضى الله عنه Then, Sayyiduna Ibn Abbas
saying that a person's laughing and weeping, his pleasure and displeasure are all from
Allah who alone has created them. Hence, how is weeping liable to be punished?
However, this suggestion of Ibn Abbas usan>, is untenable, for every deed of the creatures
is created by Allah. A person only does it and reward or punishment follows on it. For
instance, if anyone laughs on seeing another Muslim out of happiness then he earns
reward, but if he laughs to ridicule him then he commits a sin. In the same manner are
other things, like happiness and sorrow, for they may got reward or punishment. Hence,
the suggestion of Ibn Abbas As an , can be worthy if 'laughing and weeping' are
involuntary, but if laughing or weeping is at the person's discretion then reward or
punishment will follow.
Sayyiduna Ibn Umar رضى الله عنه said nothing on hearing Ibn Abbas رضى الله عنه not because he
conceded to the opinion of Ibn Abbas as an +), but because he decided to end the discussion
in the fashion of the learned.
DO NOT WEEP OVER THE DEAD
(١٧٤٣) وَعَنُ عَائِشَةً قَالَتْ لَمَّا جَاءَ النَّبِيَّ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ قَتْلُ ابْنٍ حَارِثَةً وَجَعْفَرٍ وَابْنِ رَوَاحَةً جَلَّسَ
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يُعْرَفُ فِيْهِ الْحُزْنُ وَأَنَا أَنْظُرُ مِنْ صَائِرِ الْبَّابِ تَعْنِى شَقَّ الْبَابِ فَأَتَاهُ رَجُلْ فَقَالَ إِكَّ نِسَآءَ جَعْفَرٍ وَذَكَّرَ
بُكَّمَ هُنَّ فَأَمَرَهُ أَنْ يَّنْهَا هُنَّ فَذَهَبَ تُؤَّ آتَاهُ الثَّانِيَةَّ لَمْ يُطِعْنَهُ فَقَالَ الْهَهُنَّ فَأَتَاهُ القَّالِفَةَ قَالَ وَاللَّهِ فَلَبْنَا
يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ فَزَعَمَتُ أَنَّهُ قَالَ فَاحْتُ فِىْ أَفْوَاهِمِنَّ الُّرَابَ فَقُلْتُ أَرْغَمَ اللَّهُ أَنْفَكَ لَمْ تَفْعَلُ مَآ أَمَرَكَ
رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ وَلَمْ تَتُكْ رَسُولَ اللهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ مِنَ الْعَنَآءِ (متفق عليه)
1743. Sayyidah Ayshah رضى الله عنها narrated that when the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم was
informed of the martyrdom of (Sayyiduna) Ibn Harithah رضى الله عنه, Ja'far رضى الله عنه and
Ibn Rawahah usa (+) (in the battle of Mutah) he sat down, grief apparent on him.
She looked at him from the crevice of the door. A man came to him and spoke of the
weeping of the women of Ja'far as an .). So, he instructed the man to forbid them
from weeping and he went but came a second time for they did not obey. He again
sent him to prevent them (from weeping). He came a third time, saying, "By Allah, .
رضى الله عنها they have got the better of us, O Messenger of Allah's (Sayyidah) Ayshah
thought that he said, "pour dust in their mouths. She exclaimed thereupon (to the'
صلى الله عليه man), "May Allah humble you! You could not do what Allah's Messenger
, commanded you to do and you also did not cease to irk him."1
-
COMMENTARY: The words 'pour dust in their mouths' perhaps are a figurative speech to
say, 'Leave them alone. They are in a state of shock when advice will have no effect on them."
(١٧٤٤) وَعَنْ أُمِّ سَلَمَةً قَالَتْ لَمَّا مَاتَ أَبُوْسَلَمَةَ قُلْتُ غَرِيُبْ وَفِعْ أَرْضِ غُرُبَةٍ لَاَ بُكِيِّنَّهُ بُكَاءٌ يُتَحَدَّثُ عَنْهُ
فَكُنْتُ قَدْ تَيَأْتُ لِلْبِكَّءِ عَلَيْهِ إِذَا أَقْبَلَتِ امْرَأَةٌ تُرِيدُ أَنْ تُسْجِدَنِيْ فَاسْتَقْبَلَهَا رَسُولُ اللهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ
آَتْرِيُدِيْنَ آَنْ تُدْخِلِ الشَّيْطَانَ بَيْتًا آَخْرَجَهُ اللَّهُ مِنْهُ مَرَّتَيْنٍ وَكَفَفْتُ عَنِ الْبُكَاءِ فَلَمْ آَبُكِ (رواه مسلم)
1744. Sayyidah Umm Salamah à», narrated that when Sayyiudna Abu Salamah
usas>, died, she thought that he was a stranger in an alien land so she would weep
for him such a weeping as would be exemplary. Thus, she prepared for the weeping
over him, when, behold! A woman arrive with intention to join and help her. But,
Allah's Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم confronted her (before she came in) and asked, "Is it
your aim to bring the devil into a house from which Allah has thrown him out
twice?" She, therefore, refrained from weeping and wept not (as Shari'ah (divine
law) has disallowed). 2
COMMENTARY: Perhaps Sayyidah Umm Salamah As a+, did not know till then that it
was disallowed to weep aloud and to wail otherwise she would not have done that which
Shri'ah had forbidden.
The devil was cast out from the house when Abu Salamah As a +, had thrown out disbelief
and polytheism to embrace Islam. The second time the devil was cast when Abu Salamah
us ino, departed from the dark, ignorant world with faith and Islam.
1 Bukhari # 1299, Muslim # 30.935, Nasa'i # 1847, Musnad Ahmad 6.59.
2 Muslim # 10.922.
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WAILING NOT ALLOWED
(١٧٤٥) وَعَنِ التُّعْمَانِ بْنِ بَشِيْرٍ قَالَ أُغْمِىَ عَلَى عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ رَوَاحَةً فَجَعَلَتْ أُخْتُهُ عَمُرَةُ تَبْكِئْ وَاجَبَلَاهُ
وَاكَذَا وَاكَذَا تُعَدِّدُ عَلَيْهِ فَقَالَ حِيْنَ آفَاقَ مَا قُلْتِ شَيْئًا إِلَّ قِيْلَ لِىِّ أَنْتَ كَذُلِكَ زَادَ فِيْ رِوَايَةٍ فَلَمَّا مَاتَ لَهُ
تَبُكِ عَلَيْهِ(رواه البخارى)
1745. Sayyiduna an-Numan ibn Bashir 4:e du+) narrated that (Sayyiduna) Abdullah ibn
Rawahah (fell ill so much that he) fainted. His sister, Amrah, wept (profusely) and
shrieked, "O mountain how sad! O this and that how sad! O this and that how sad! O
such and such how Sad!" She recounted his goodness. When he regained
consciousness, he said, 'You did not say anything but I was asked, "Are you like that?"
Another version also has: when he died, she did not weep over him. 1
(١٧٤٦) وَعَنْ أَبِيْ مُؤْسى قَالَ سَمِعْتُ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ يَقُوُلُ مَا مِنْ مَيِّتٍ يَّهُوْتُ فَيَقُوُهُ
بَاكِيْهِمْ فَيَقُوْلُ وَاجَبَلَاهُ وَاسَيِّدَاهُ وَتَخْوَ ذَلِكَ إِلَّ وَثَّلَ اللّهُ بِهِ مَلَكَيْنِ يَلْهَزَانِهِ وَيَقُوْلَانٍ آَهْكِّذَا كُنْتَ۔
رَوَاهُ التِّرْمِذِىُّ وَقَالَ هُذَا حَدِيْثُ غَرِيْبُ حَسَنٌ.
صلى الله عليه narrated that he heard Allah's Messenger رضى الله عنه Sayyiduna Abu Musa .1746
, say, "If anyone dies and anyone mourning for him says, 'O the mountains! O
the chief!' or something like that, then Allah appoint over him two angels who beat
him on the chest and ask him, 'where you like that?'2
COMMENTARY: The dead, in the hadith, could also mean the dying.
Previously, this question has been discussed against the hadith # 1742 and # 1724. More
discussion follows here.
Allahmah (leaned Scholar) Suyuti alda>, has said in sharh us Sudur about he hadith (# `742);
'The dead is punished for the keeping of his people over him, that different opinions are
expressed about it. He has enumerated the various versions in sequence.
(1)
This hadith means what is apparent from its words and is absolute,
irrespective of whether or not there is a will about it, or the dead is a
disbeliever or not. If anyone wails over the dead then the dead is punished.
This is Suyyiduna Umar رضى الله عنه and Ibn Umar رضى الله عنه interpreted it.
(2)
The dead person is no it subjected at all, to punishment for the weeping of
his folk.
(3)
Punishment depends on the situation. The dead person already undergoes
when his folk are weeping over him, but the punishment is not because of
their weeping. Rather it is because of his sins and evil deeds.
(4)
This hadith is specifically about the disbelievers.
Both the foregoing interpretations belong to Sayidah Ayshah usd+).
(5)
This hadith and the warning are particularly about the person whose
people are used to wailing. This is the contention of Imam Bukhari.
(6)
This hadith is about one who instructs his folks and heirs to wail over him
1 Bukhari # 4267.
2 Tirmidhi # 1005, Ibn Majah # 1594, Musnad Ahmad # 19737.

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after his death.
(7)
This hadith concerns one who does not instruct his folk not to wail over
him knowing that they are liable to observe wailing after his death. It is
wajib (expedient) for such people to forbid their folk to wail after them.
(8)
The dead is punished when his folk wail over him and say about him such
thing as are evil in the eyes of Shari'ah (divine law), as people during the
Jahiliyah (ignorance period) said about their dead, 'O you who have
rendered women widows.' 'O who have orphaned children.' 'O who have
ruined the house.'
(9)
Punishment is the wrath of the angels because of describing the dead in the
mentioned manner while weeping.
(10)
When the family of the dead wail, the dead is subjected to punishment in
his grave.
Some people say that punishment means the weeping of bereaved in a wrong way not
valid in Shari'ah (divine law). Then the dead experienced a severe spiritual pain and he is
grieved. It is like when a soul goes from the world to the barzakh, the souls that are already
there ask the new comer about their people in the world. If one of them gets an adverse
report of its relatives committing sin then it feels grieved and sad If the report discloses that
they are pious then the concerned soul it elated.
In short, if the dead person is himself responsible for the wailing, in any way, then the
punishment mentioned in the hadith will be deemed to be in its real meaning, If they wail,
he will be punished.
If the dead is not responsible in any way and does not like such things, then punishment will
mean that he will be grieved. He might be grieved when he is on the point of death, or after
1
death and he might be a disbeliever or a Muslim. In this regard, all are equally effected.
In this way, the verse of t he Quran (6:164) and the absolute ahadith on this subject are
reconciled.
WEEPING WITHOUT SHRIEKING
(١٧٤٧) وَعَنْ أَبِيْ هُرَيْرَةً قَالَ مَاتَ مَّيِّتْ ◌ِنْ الِ رَسُوْلِ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ فَاجْتَمَعَ النِّسَآءُ يَبْكِيْنَ
عَلَيْهِ فَقَامَ عُمَّرُ يَنْهَا هُنَّ وَيَطْرُدُ هُنَّ فِقَالَ رَسُولُ اللهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ دَعْهُنَّ يَا عُمَرُ فَإِنَّ الْعَيْنَ
دَامِعَةٌ وَالْقَلْبُ مُصَابٌ وَالْعَهْدُ قَرِيبٌ (رواه أحمد والنسائى)
1747. Sayyiduna 'Abu Hurayrah us a >, narrated that someone of the family of
Allah's Messenger died. The women gathered and wept for the dead. Sayyiduna
Umar as ås +, stood up and forbade them (the relatives) and drove away others (the
strangers). Allah's Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم said, "Leave them alone, O Umar, for the
eyes weep, the heart aches and affliction is recent."1
COMMENTARY: Sayyiduna Umar As a +, stopped the woman because he thought they
might exceed and begin to shriek. The Prophet (,,le an advised him to let women vent
their natural feelings and not curb their innate emotions.
1 Nasa'i # 1859, Ibn Majah # 1587, Musnad Ahmad 2-444.
1

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(١٧٤٨) وَعَنِ ابْنِ عَبَّاسٍ قَالَ مَاتَتْ زَّيْنَبُ بِئْتُ رَسُولِ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ فَبَكَتِ النِّسَآءُ فَجَعَلَ
عُمَرُ يَضْرِ بُهُنَّ بِسَوْطِهِ فَأَخَّرَهُ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ بِيَّدٍٍ وَقَالَ مَهْلَّايَا حُمَرُ ثُمَّ قَالَ إِيَّا كُنَّ وَنَحِيْقَ
الشَّيْطَانِ تُؤَّ قَالَ إِنَّهُ مَهُمَا كَانَ مِنَ الْعَبْنِ وَمِنَ الْقَلْبِ فَمِنَ اللَّهِ عَزَّ وَجَلَّ وَمِنَ الرَّحْمَةِ وَمَا كَانَ مِنَ
الْيَدِ وَ مِنَ الْلِّسَانِ فَمِنَ الشَّيْطَانِ -(رواه احمد)
رضى الله عنها narrated that when (Sayyidah) Zaynab رضى الله عنه Sayyiduna Ibn Abbas .1748
daughter of Allah's Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم died, the women wept. But (Sayiduna)
Umar رضى الله عنه beat them with his whip. Allah's Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم put him back
with his hands, saying, "Be mild, O Omar." To the woman, he said, "Beware of the
shrieking of the devil." Then, he said, "That which is from the eye and from the
heart is from Allah's Mighty and Glorious, and represents mercy. But, that which is
from the hand and the tongue is from the devil."1
COMMENTARY: The hand is instrumental in beating oneself, slapping, tearing clothing,
etc. The tongue wails, shrieks and utter that Allah does not like.
ONE YEAR'S VIGIL OVER GRAVE
(١٧٤٩) وَعَنِ الْبُخَارِيِّ تَعْلِيْقًا قَالَ لَّا مَاتَ الْحُسَنُ بْنُّ الْحُسَنِ بُنِ عَلِيٍّ ضَرَبَتِ امْرَأَتُّهُ الْقُبَّةَّ عَلَى قَبْرِهِسَنَةًّ ◌ُؤَّ
رَفَعَتْ فَسَمِعَتُ صَائِحًا يَقُولُ اَلَّاهَلُ وَجَدُوا مَا فَقَدُوْا فَأَجَابَهُ أُخَرُبَلُ يَئِهُوا فَانْقَلَبُوْا-
1
1749. Imam Bukhari aldas, narrated in a ta'liq from (without a line of transmission)
that when Sayyiduna Hasan رحمه الله son of (Sayyiduna) Hasan ibn Ali رضى الله عنه died, his
wife pitched a tent over his grave for one year when she dismantled it. (At that) she
heard a voice shout, "Did they find what they had last?" Another (voice) replied,
"Rather they are dejected, and have departed!2
.رحمه الله was also named Hasan رضى الله عنه COMMENTARY: The son of Sayyiduna Hasan ibn Ali
When he died, his wife erected a tent and lived in it over the grave for one year. She
refreshed his memory every day.
Perhaps, she did it to have his friends, etc assemble there for praying for him.
A CUSTOM OF JAHILIYAH (IGNORANCE PERIOD)
(١٧٥٠) وَعَنْ عِمْرَانَ بْنِ حُصَيْنٍ وَ آبٍ بَرُزَّةً قَالَّا خَرَجُنَا مَعَ رَسُولِ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ فِي جَنَازَةٍ
فَرَأْى قَوْمًّا قَدْ طَرَحُوا أَرْدِيَّتَّهُمْ يَمْشُوْنَ فِيْ قُهُصٍ فَقَالَ رَسُولُ اللّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ اَيِفِعْلِ الْجَاهِلِيَّةِ
تَأْخَذُونَ أَوْ بِصَنِيْعِ الْجَاهِلِيَّةِ تَشَبَّهُوْنٌ لَقَدْ هَمَمْثُ آَنْ آَدُهُوَ عَلَيْكُمُ دَغْوَقُ تَرُچِهُوُنَ فِى غَيْرِ صُوَّرِكُمُ
قَالَ فَآَخَذُوًا أَرْدِيَتَهُمْ وَلَمْ يَهُوُدُوا لِذَلِكَ(رواه ابن ماجة)
رضى الله عنه and Sayyiduna Abu Barzah رضى الله عنه Sayyiduna Imran ibn Husayn .1750
narrated that they accompanied Allah's Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم to a funeral. He saw
1 Musnad Ahmad 1-335.
2 Bukhari Book of Funerals Chapter # 61, heading.

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there some people who had removed their cloaks and were walking in (their) shirts.
Allah's Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم asked, 'Will you stick to the doings of the Jahiliyah
(ignorance period)?" Or "will you resemble the people of the jahiliyah(ignorance
period) in what they did? I had resolved to pray against you that you return (home)
in an appearance different from yours" They took their cloaks and did never return
to that (practice).1
COMMENTARY: In ancient times people wore a cloak over their shirts. The pre-Islamic
people removed in to show their state of grief.
Teebi anos, pointed out that this seemingly minor neglect invited a serious warning, so we
can imagine the fate of those who follow more complex and prohibited customs.
WHEN SHARI'AH (DIVINE LAW) IS VIOLATED DO NOT ACCOMPANY THE FUNERAL
(١٧٥١) وَعَنِ ابْنِ عُمَرَ قَالَ تَى رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ اَنْ تُتْبَةَ جَنَازَةٌ مَعَهَا رَانَّةٌ(رواه أحمد وابن ماجة)
صلى الله عليه وسلم narrated that Allah's Messenger رضى الله عنه Sayyiduna Ibn Umar .1751
forbade going with a funeral that had a wailing woman with it.2
COMMENTARY: While it is sunnah (as per prophet's teaching) to walk with the sunnah (as
per prophet's practice), yet this sunnah (Practice of Holy Prophet , le dl .) may be
abandoned when anything contrary to sunnah (Prophet's teaching) is perpetrated.
NEW BORN WILL TAKE PARENTS TO PARADISE
:
(١٧٥٢) وَعَنْ آنِيْ هُرَيْرَةَ آَثّ رَجُلًا قَالَ لَهُ مَاتَ ابْنُ لِّيْ فَوَجَدْتُّ عَلَيْهِ هَلْ سَمِعْتَ مِنْ خَلِيْلِكَ
صَلّوَاتُ اللَّهِ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَامُهُ شَيْئًا يَّطِيبُ بِأَنْفُسِنَا عَنْ مَوْتَانًا قَالَ نَّعَمْ سَمِعْتُه صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ
قَالَ صِغَارُ هُمْ دَعًا مِيْصُ الْجُنَّةِ يَلْقَى أَحَدُهُمُ آَبَاهُ فَيَأْخُذُ بِنَاحِيَةٍ ثَوْبِهٍ فَلَا يُفَارِقُهُ حَتَّى يُدْ خِلَهُ الْجُنَّةَ
1
رَوَاهُ مُسْلِمْ وَ أَحْمَدُ وَاللَّفْظُ لَه۔
1752. Sayyiduna Abu Hurayrah As an , narrated that a man said to him that his
(young) son had died and he was sorrowful over that. He asked, "Have you heard
anything from your friend, may Allah's blessing and peace be on him, that may
comfort us concerning our dead." He said, "Yes. I heard him, may Allah's blessing
(الاطفال دعا ميص الجنة) and peace be on him say that their young children will be like
da'amis of paradise. When one of them meet his (or her) father, he will grasp the
edge of his garment and not let go will he is admitted to paradise."3
COMMENTARY: Da'amis is the plural of .Da'amus. (At the end of this commentary. We
reproduce the relative paragraph from lane's lexicon against the word)
The dead child is compared to da'mus because it will roam about in paradise. There will be
no restriction in paradise in children's movement just as there is no bar on children in the
world. They can enter any house, any place and will not be stopped.
This hadith mentions only father perhaps because the subject concerned a father.
However, the child will also get its mother admitted to paradise. Indeed, some ahadith
1 Ibn Majah # 1458.
2 Ibn Majah # 1583.
3 Muslim # 154-2635, Musnad Ahmad 2-488.

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mention both the parents.
(The following paragraph is extracted from Lane's Lexican Book I part 3 p 883 - Translation:)
( yes) A certain animalcule (s) that dives in water or a certain black animalcule that
scrims upon water: or a certain worm (5>>>), that is in pools left by torrents when their water
sinks into the earth; or a certain worm (as)>) having two heads, seen in water when it
becomes little in quantity; (دعاميص) and (دعاميص) [Hence app .. ] One who much into affair; who
is a frequent visitor of kings. And hence, (الاطفال دعاميص الجنة) meaning [Infants will be] roomers
in Paradise; they will not be debarred from any dwelling; a trad .; but the words occurring
in a trad of Abo-Hurayrah are. (صغاركم دعاميص الجنة) [Your little children]
REWARD WHEN CHILDREN DIE
(١٧٥٣) وَعَنُ آَبِ سَعِيْدٍ قَالَ جَآءَتِ امْرَأَّةٌ إِلَى رَسُولِ اللهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ فَقَالَتْ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِذَهَبَ
الرِّجَالُ مِّدِيْثِكَ فَاجْعَلُ لََّا مِنْ تَّفْسِاتَ يَوْمًّا تَأْتِيْكَ فِيْهِ تُعَلِّمُنَا مِمَّا عَلَّمَكَ اللَّهُ فَقَالَ اجْتَمِعُنَ فِيْ يَوْمِ كَذَا
وَكَّذَا فِيْ مَكَانٍ كَذَا وَكَذَا فَاجْتَمَعْنَ فَأَتَا هُنَّ رَسُوْلُ اللهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ فَعَلَّمَهُنَّ مِمَّا عَلَّمَهُ اللّهُ ثُّؤَّ
قَالَ مَا مِنْكُنَّ ◌ِمْرَ أَّةٌ تُقَدِّمُ بَيْنَّ يَدَيْهَا مِنْ وَلَدِهَا ثَلَّافَةً إِلَّ كَانَ لَّهَا حِجَابًا مِنَ النَّارِ فَقَالَتِ امْرَ أَكُ قِنْهُنَّ یَا
تَسْؤُلَ اللَّهِ أَوِ اثْنَيْنٍ فَأَعَادَتُهَا مَرَّتَيْنِ ثُمَّ قَالَ وَاثْنَيْنٍ وَاثْنَيْنٍ وَاثْنَيْنٍ (رواه البخارى)
1753. Sayyiduna Abu Sa'eed رضى الله عنه narrated that a woman come to Allah's
Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم and submitted, "O Messenger of Allah, the men do benefit
from your sayings. So, do set us aside a day with yourself that we may come to you
on it and you may teach us from what Allah has taught you." He said, "Assemble all
of you on such and such a day at such and such a place." Accordingly, they did
assembled there and he came to them and imparted to them some of the knowledge
that Allah had taught him. Thereafter, he said, "If three children of a woman among
you die before her then they will be a before her then they will be a barrier from
hell for her." A woman among them asked, "O Messenger of Allah, or two?" She
asked that twice. He said, "Also two, two, two!"1
(١٧٥٤) وَعَنْ مُعَاذٍ بْنٍ جَبَلٍ قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ مَا مِنُ مُسْلِمَيْنَ يُتَوَّى لَّهُمَا ثَلَاقَةُ إِلَّا
اَدُخَلَهُمَا اللَّهُ الْجُنَّةَ بِفَضْلٍ رَحْمَتِهِ إِيَّا هُمَا فَقَالُوا يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ أَوِثْتَانٍ قَالَ آَوِثْنَانٍ قَالُوا أَوْ وَاحِدْ قَالَ
أَوْ وَاحِدْ ثُمَّ قَالَ وَالَّذِى نَفْسِىِ بِيِّدِهِ إِثَّ السِّقْطَ لَيَجُّ أُمَّهُ بِسَرَرِهِ إِلَى الْجَنَّةِ إِذَا اخْتَسَبَتْهُ- رَوَاءُ أَحْمَدُ وَرَوَى
ابْنُ مَاجَةً مِنْ قَوْلِهِ وَالَّذِى نَفْسِ بِيِّدِه-
صلى الله عليه narrated that Allah's Messenger رضى الله عنه Sayyiduan Mu'adh ibn Jabal .1754
, said, 'If three (children) of a Muslim couple die then Allah will admit them to
paradise because of His exclusive mercy on them" The sahabah (companions) & co,
+ asked, "O Messenger of Allah, or two?" He agreed, "Or two!" They again asked,
"Or one?" Then he continued, "By Him in whose hand is my soul, surely the foetus
1 Ibn Majah # 1605, Musnad Ahmad 5-241.

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(or the abortion) will pull its mother to paradise by its umbilical cord when she
regards (the loss as) a mean of reward (and observes patience)."1
COMMENTARY: The mother had not yet established a motherly relationship with the
adoration. In spite of that, their relationship is said to be joined by the umbilical cord.
Imagine the reward that will accrue to the mother when her infant, whom she has given
her love, dies.
(١٧٥٥) وَعَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ مَسْعُوْدٍ قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ مَنْ قَدَّمَ ثَلَاثَةً مِّنَ الْوَلَدِ لَهُ
يَبْلُغُو الْمِنْثَ كَانُوا لَهُ حِصْنًّا حَصِيْنًا ◌ِنَ الثَّارِ فَقَالَ أَبُوْذَرٍ قَدَّمْتُ اثْنَيْنٍ قَالَ وَاثْنَيْنٍ قَالَ أُبَبُّ بُنُّ كَعَبٍ
أَبُوالْمُنْذِرِ سَيِّدُ الْقُرَّاءِ قَدَّمْتُ وَاحِدًّا قَالَ وَوَاحِدًّا- رَوَاهُ التِّزْمِذِىُّ وَ ابْنُ مَاجَةَ وَقَالَ التِّرْمِذِىُّ لهذَا
حَدِيثٌ غَرِيُبْ
صلى الله narrated that Allah's Messenger رضى الله عنه Sayyiduna Abdullah ibn Mas'ud .1755
yohe said, 'He who is predeceased by three minor children will find them as a
strong fortress for him against the fire." (Sayyiduna) Abu Dharr usan», said, "I have
been predeceased by two." He said, "And, two!" Then, Sayyiduna Ubayy ibn Ka'b
(whose kunyah was) Abu Mundhir, the chief, of the reciters of the Quran, said, "I
have lost one child ahead of me.' He said, "And, one also!"2
(Tirmidhi also has; "But that is only if patience is shown at the first shock.
(١٧٥٦) وَعَنْ قُرَّةَ الْمُزَّنِيْ آَكَّ رَجُلًّا كَانَ يَأْتِ النَِّيَّ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ وَمَعَهُ ابْنْ لَّهُ فَقَالَ لَهُ الشَّبِىُّ صَلَّى
اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ أَتْحِيُّهُ فَقَالَ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ أَحَبَّكَ اللّهُ كَمَا أُحِبُّهُ فَفَقَدَهُ النَّبِىُّ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ فَقَالَ مَا فَعَلَ
ابْنُ قُلَانٍ قَالُوا يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ مَاتَ فَقَالَ تَسُولُ اللهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ آَمَاتُحِبُ أَنْ لَّا تَأْقِ بَابًا مِنْ
أَجْوَابِ الْجِنَّةِإِلَّ وَجَدْتَّه يَنْتَظِرُكَ فَقَالَ رَجُلْ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِلَهُ خَاصَّةً أَمْ لِكُلْنَا قَالَ بَلُ لِكُلِّكُمُ (رواه احمد)
1756. Sayyiduna Qurrah al-Muzani As a+, narrated that a man used to visit the
Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم along with one of his sons. The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم asked him,
"Do you love him (so much that you keep him with you always)?" He said, "O
Messenger of Allah, may Allah love you as I love him." Then, the Prophet le ino
missed him and asked (people) what had happened to the man's son. They said,
"O Messenger of Allah, he has died." So, Allah's Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم asked (the
man when they met), "would you not love to meet him at whichever the gates of
paradise you come (on the day of resurrection)?" Someone asked, "O Messenger of
Allah, does this apply to him alone or to all of us?" He said, "Rather, to all of you."3
ABORTION WILL TAKE ITS PARENTS TO PARADISE
(١٧٥٧) وَعَنْ عَلِيٍّ قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللهِ صَلَّى اللّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ إِكَّ السِّقْطَ لَيْرَا غِمُ رَبَّهُ إِذَا أَدْخَلَ أَبَوَيُهِ النَّارَ
1 Ibn Majah # 1604, Musnad Ahmad 5-241.
2 Tirmidhi # 1063, Ibn Majah # 1606, Musnad Ahmad # 4077, (Adopted from Tirmidhi, Darul Isha'at
Karachi).
3 Musnad Ahmad 5-35.

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فَيُقَالُ أَيُّهَا السِّقْطُ الْمُرَاغِهُ رَبَّهُ آدْخِلُ أَبَوَيُكَ الْجُنَّةً فَيَجُرُّ هُمَا بِسَرَرِهِ حَتَّى يُدْخِلَهُمَا الْجُنَّةَ(رواه ابن ماجة)
1757. Sayyiduna Ali رضى الله عنه narrated that Allah's Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم said that the
aborted child will argue with its Lord when He sends its parents to hell. It will be
told, "O the aborted child who argues with its Lord, take your parents to paradise."
So, it will pull them with its umbilical cord and bring them into paradise.1
PATIENCE IS REWARDED WITH PARADISE
(١٧٥٨) وَعَنْ آتيْ أُمَامَةً عَنِ النَّبِيِّ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ قَالَ يَقُولُ اللَّهُ تَبَارَكَ وَتَعَالَى ابْنَ أَدَهَ إِلُ صَبِّرُتَ
وَاحْتَسَبْتَ عِنْدَ القَّدَمَةِ الْأُولِى لَمْ أَرْضَ لَكَ ثَوَابًّا دُونَ الْجَنَّةِ(رواه ابن ماجة)
1758. Sayyiduna Abu Umamah رضى الله عنه narrated that the Prophet صلى اللهعليه وسلم said that
Allah, Blessed and Exalted, says, "O son of Aadam, if you exercise patience and
seek reward at the first shock, I shall not be pleased for you with a reward lesser
than paradise."2
MERIT OF ISTIRJA
(١٧٥٩) وَعَنِ الْحُسَيِّنِ بْنِ عَلِيٍّ عَنِ النَّبِيِّ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ قَالَ مَا مِنْ مُسْلِيٍ قَلَّا مُسْلِمَةٍ يُّصَابٌ بِمُصِيبَةٍ
فَيَذْكُرُهَا وَإِكْ طَالَ عَهْدُ هَا فَيُحْدِثُ لِذَلِكَ إِسْتِرْجَاعًا إِلَّ جَدَّدَ اللَّهُ تَبَارَكَ وَتَعَالِى لَهُ عِنْدَ ذَلِكَ فَأَعْطَاهُ
مِثْلَ آخرِهَا يَوْمَ اُصِيبٌ پھا(رواه احمد والبيهقى فى شعب الإيمان)
1759. Sayyiduna Husayn ibn Ali رضى الله عنه narrated that the Prophet صلى اللهعليهوسلم said, 'If
a Muslim man or woman suffers a hardship and recalls it, even after a long period
of time and says:
إِنَّا لِلْهِ وَإِنَّا إِلَيْهِرَاچِهُوْنَ
(We belong to Allah and to Him is our return).
Allah, Blessed and Exalted, renews a reward whenever it is said like the reward for it on
the day he was afflicted."3
(١٧٦٠) وَعَنْ أَبيْ هُرَيْرَةً قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ إِذَا انْقَطَعَ شِسُهُ أَحَدِكُمْ فَلْيَسْتَرْ جِعُ فَإِنَّه
مِنَ الْمَصَائِپ۔
صلى الله عليه وسلم narrated that Allah's Messenger رضى الله عنه Sayyiduna Abu Hurayrah .1760
said, "When the thong of someone's sandal breaks, let him say;
إِنَّا لِلْهِ وَإِنَّا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعُونَ
(To Allah we belong and to him is our return)
because this too is one of the afflictions."4
COMMENTARY: This means that even if one faces a simple, ordinary difficulty, he must
1 Ibn Majah # 1597.
2 Ibn Majah # 1608.
3 Musnad Ahmad 1-201,
4 Bayhaqi in Sha'b ul Eeman # 9693.

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ecite the istirja. Once, a lantern blow off, so the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم recited this verse of the
(2:156) - (إِنَّالِثْ وَ إِنَّ إِلَيهِرَاجِعُونَ) Quran
GREAT DISTINCTION OF THIS UMMAH
(١٧٦١) وَعَنْ أُقِ الذَّرْدَآءِ قَالَتْ سَمِعْتُ أَبَا الدَّرْدَآءِ يَقُولُ سَمِعْتُ أَبَا الْقَاسِمِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ يَقُوْلُ
إِثّ اللّهُ تَبَارَكَ وَتَعَالِى قَالَ يَا عِيْنِى إِنَّيْ بَاعِتٌ مِنْ بَعْدِكَ أُمَّّ إِذَا أَصَابَهُمْ مَا يُحِبُّونَ حَمِدُوا اللهَ وَاكْ
أَصَابَهُمْ مَّايَكْرَهُوْنَ احْتَسَبُوا وَصَبَرُوا وَلَّا حِلْمَ وَلَّا عَقُلَ فَقَالَ يَا رَتٍ كَيْفَ يَكُوُُ هُذَا لَهُمُ وَلَا
حِلْمَ وَلَّا عَقْلَ قَالَ أُعْطِيُهِمُ فِنْ حِلْمِيٍ وَعِلُبِيْ دَوَاهُمَا الْبَيْهَقِىُّ فِيْ شُعَبِ الْإِيمَانِ
1761. Sayyiduna Umm Darda us à », narrated that she heard Sayyiduna Abu as-
Darda رضى الله عنه say that he heard Abu al-Qasim صلى الله عليه وسلم say that Allah, Blessed and
Exalted, said, "O Easa, I shall send after you an ummah who will praise Allah when
what pleases them takes place with them, and who will seek their reward from
Allah and exercise patience when that which displeases them afflicts them, though
they will not possess forbearance and intelligence." So, he asked, "My Lord, how
will it be without having forbearance and intelligence?" He said, "I shall grant
them some portion of My forbearance and knowledge."1
COMMENTARY: Here, ummah means the obedient and righteous followers of the Prophet
That they will not possess intelligence and forbearance means that they will .صلى الله عليه وسلم
lose these things because of distress. Yet they will show endurance and seek reward. In the
absence of these two traits a person cannot endure yet they will be enabled to do so. Allah
will cause them to have the two traits without efforts, as His own grant.
CHAPTER - VIII
VISITING GRAVES
بَابُ زِيَارَةِ الْقُبُورِ
The ahadith in this chapter, as well as the aathar, speak of the merit and etiquette of
visiting graves. The relative rules and issues are also given place here. The purpose of
visiting graves and what is achieved on going there will be brought out, too.
SECTION I
الْفَضلُ الأوَّلْ
MUSTAHAB (DESIRABLE) TO VISIT GRAVES
(١٧٦٢) عَنْ بُرَيْدَةً قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ ثَمَيْتُكُمْ عَنْ زِيَارَةِ الْقُبُوْرِ فَزُؤْرُؤُهَا
وَتَيْتُكُمُ عَنْ مُؤْمِ الْأَصَاحِيّ قَوْقَ ثَلَاثٍ فَأَفْسِكُوْا ◌َابَدًا لَكُمْ وَتَهَيْئُكُمُ عَنِ النَّبِيْذِ إِلَّ فِى سِقَآءٍ فَأَشْرِبُوا
فِي الْأَسْقِيَّةِ كُلِّهَا وَلَّا تَشْرِبُوْا مُسْكِرًا (رواه مسلم)
صلى الله عليه وسلم narrated that Allah's Messenger رضى الله عنه Sayyiduna Buraydah .1762
said, "I had forbidden you to visit graves, but you may (now) visit them. I had
forbidden you to (store and) eat flesh of sacrificial animals beyond three days, but
you may (now) store that as long as you please. I had forbidden you nabidh except
1 Bukhari in Sha'b ul Eeman # 9953.

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(to drink) in a waterskin so you may drink in all kinds (of vessels), but not drink
what intoxicates."1
COMMENTARY: In early Islam, the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم had forbidden visit to graves
because the Jahiliyah (ignorance period) was recent and not totally out of minds. It was
possible that visitors to graves might perpetrate what disbelievers and associators did.
Later, when Islam had set in, he permitted visit to graves. The ulama (Scholars) agree that it
is mustahab (desirable) to visit graves. The heart softens and one remembers death.
Moreover, it is sunnah (as per teaching of Holy Prophet ,,,le ano) to pray for mercy and
forgiveness of the dead in the graveyard. The Prophet ,,lean Lo used to visit graves of the
Baqi and offer salaam to the dead and pray for them.
WOMEN VISITING GRAVES
The ulama (Scholars) differ on whether women may visit graves or the initial command
forbidding visit to graves continues to be applied to them. The correct ruling is that women
are allowed to visit the grave of the Prophet Llano only, but it is not proper for them
to visit g raves of other people.
This question has been discussed in the commentary against the hadith # 740 in the chapter
on mosques, etc. The juristic traditions are also cited there.
KINDS OF VISITS
With regard to purpose, there are many reasons for visiting grave.
(i)
Only to think of death and the hereafter. To achieve this, it is enough to see
the graves without worrying about who the dweller is and how he
behaved in life.
(ii)
To make supplication, seek forgiveness and consign reward and so on.
This is masnun for every Muslim.
(iii)
To receive blessing. To achieve this, graves of saintly men and spiritual
leaders should be visited because there are many blessings from them
while they are in the barzakh.
(iv)
To give rights of the relatives and friends, like parents and so on. According
to hadith Abu Nu'aym, "If anyone visits the graves of his parents or one of
them on Friday, then this act will be like performing hajj."
(v)
To promote or respect religious fraternity and love. According to hadith,
"If anyone comes to the grave of any believing brother and offers him
salaam and prays for him, then the dead person recognizes him and
responds to his salaam (greetings)."
MANNER AND COMMAND
(i)
If anyone goes to a grave to pray for his forgiveness and to consign reward
to him, he must stand opposite to the face of the grave-dweller with his
face towards the grave and back towards the qiblah.
(ii)
At the grave, he must first offer salaam to the grave-dweller.
(iii)
He must not touch the grave.
(iv)
He must not kiss the grave.
(v)
He must not bow in respect opposite the grave, nor must he prostrate to it.
(vi)
He must not wipe the dust of the grave on his face as the Christians do.
1 Muslim # 106.977, Abu Dawud # 3698, Nasa'i # 2032, Musnad Ahmad 1-145.

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.
It is extremely misguided and wrong to do anything that has no sanction in Shari'ah
(divine law).
It is not makruh (unbecoming) to recite the Quran near the grave.
It is mustahab (desirable), if any one dies, to recite there surah al-Ikhlas seven times and
consign its reward to the grave-dweller.
It is more meritorious to visit graves on Friday particularly in the early part of the day. This
is what people with the two sacred cities of Makkah and Madinah. They visited al-Thalla
and al-Baqi early on Friday.
It is also stated that the dead is granted more knowledge and perception on Friday than on
any other day so that the grave-dweller recognizes the visitors to his grave on Friday better
than on any other day.
As stated previously, graves should not be trodden on unnecessarily.
It is mustahab (desirable) that some charity should be given in Allah's name for seven days
after death of someone on behalf of the dead.
The meat of the sacrificial animal was not allowed to be stored beyond three days in early
Islam because of extreme poverty. Everyone could not make a sacrifice. People were
encouraged to share to flesh of sacrificial animals with the poor. When Allah brought the
Muslims out of poverty into affluency, this order was rescinded.
Nabidh is a kind of wine. Dates or grapes are soaked in water for some days. The result is
an intoxicating drink. Nabidh is a permitted drink for as long as it does not turn into an
intoxicant. In early Islam, the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم had advised that nabidh should be kept
in waterskins because a waterskin is thin and nabidh does not turn into an intoxicant in it
rapidly. He disallowed that nabidh should be kept in any other vessel because it ferments
very quickly in them and becomes an intoxicating drink. Since wine had been forbidden
recently, it was feared that people would turn to nabidh for intoxication. When people had
adjusted themselves to teetotalism, the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم allowed that nabidh may be
drunk in any vessel but he made it clear that it is allowed only till it does not intoxicate.
The prohibition does not concern a vessel but only intoxication.
PROPHET صلى الله عليه وسلم AT HIS MOTHER'S GRAVE
(١٧٦٣) وَعَنْ أَبيْ هُرَيْرَةً قَالَ زَارَا لِنَِّيُّ صَلَى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ قَبْرَأُقِهِ فَبَكُ وَأَبْكُى مَنْ حَوْلَهُ فَقَالَ اسْتَاذَنْتُ
رٍَّ فِى أَنْ أَسْتَغْفِرَ لَهَا فَلَمْ يُؤْذَنْ لِيُ وَاسْتًا ذَنْتُهُ فِي أَنْ أَزُوُرَ قَبْرَهَا فَأُذَِ لِيْ فَرُؤُرُو الْقُبُوْرَ فَإِنََّا
◌ُنَگِّرُ الْمَؤتَ(رواه مسلم)
1763. Sayyiduna Abu Hurayrah رضى الله عنه narrated that the Prophet صلى اللهعليه وسلم visited
his mother's grave. He wept and caused those around him to weep. He said, "I
sought permission of my Lord that I might make istighfar for my mother but
permission was not given to me. And I sought His permission that I might visit her
grave, and it was granted to me. So, visit graves. That reminds one of death."1
COMMENTARY: The name of the Prophet's ,.,.le ano mother was Aamnah. When he was
six years old, she took him to Madinah to meet her parents. When she was returning to
Makkah, she died at Abwa a place on the way. She was buried there. Once the Prophet a.
1 Muslim # 108, 976, Abu Dawud # 3234, Nasa'i # 2032, Ibn Majah # 1572, Musnad Ahmad 2.441.